Old People Are Farts
Written by AnnaDenise on Saturday, April 14, 2012 at 00:36
Now. I know no one wants to say it because it's 'wrong' and whatnot.
But let's face it: soon there will be more of them than there will be of us (and there's a great possibility some of you will walk over to the dark side yourselves soon) so we best get these things out in the open.
So I'll say it: old people are farts.
Well, my own grandmothers excluded of course (although my Dutch grandma used to be married to my grandpa who definitely committed the wife-beater offense on a daily basis), but generally speaking the evidence is just too clear to ignore. Most old people definitely are farts or at the least are guilty of some pretty obvious old fartery behavior. And I'm worried.
Just a short FYI: if you're really into old farts or are one yourself, you might just want to head over to the comment section without reading the post. There you can proceed to offload your bitterness on me, whilst keeping your blood pressure slightly below a dangerous level. Deal?
PS: I plan to do one on babies next.
PS2: I am really a nice person. I swear. Old people just kind of creep me out...
I can’t wait to show this to you when you’re such an old fart that you forgot about it. ;-P xo
Oh! I fully intend to do all of the above and worse!
“I just pissed myself. You deal with it.” (from a Dylan Moran show)
Except for the fur. And the ears. Brrrr the ears. Brrr… So creepy.
Gelukkig heeft oma nooit engels geleerd.
Girl! You really gave me a laugh there!
(and secretly I totally agree with you!)
Ik zeg nog, ma – het gaat natuurlijk niet over oma! Oma is tof. Maar opa had wel altijd een hemd aan onder zijn overhemd.
Hahaha— so true. This old ladies also have to wear those creepy,giant earings to increase their ears.
And then you didn’t even mention how the elderly mob run you over with their shopping carts in the super market when they decide not to queue in line, but be the next person at the cash desk! And how they pretend to be deaf when you tell them to go to the back end of the row and wait in line for their turn. And how they purposely start packing their shopping trolley in the slowest pace they possibly can BEFORE they pay and make room for the next in line so that you actually have to wait for over 15 minutes and the f***ing ice cream goes warm and runny. And all that time the entire queue behind you are loudly cursing the damn big-eared elderly troll and my kids are so bored that they have decided it’s high time to experiment with the dismembering of their sibling. SOOOOOO glad, you mentioned this, AnnaDenise!
But before you go ranting on babies…shouldn’t you aim at the parents? Babies are pretty much in the category ‘really can’t help it’. It’s the parents. I am one and I’m pretty sure I do much wrong…but seriously…there are parents who at least try to raise their kids (among which I think I can safely count myself) and those who just got kids as an accessory to their picture-perfect lives, spoiling them rotten and letting them bother and bully other people as long as they’re not bothered by them themselves. Sorry, I think your post just caught two of the major frustrations of daily life…hehehe…whoops…sorry, just see that my reply’s almost longer than your post…bad me!